5. The Red Garden by Alice Hoffman
Strange, because usually I enjoy Hoffman’s etherial quality of storytelling. The woman has a surefire knack of blending reality with a bit of a whimsical fantastical elements. The Red Garden, however, was a total bore. Stick to full length novels. Short stories don’t quite work for her.
4. Busy Monsters by William Giraldi
A guy basically goes on a hunt around the globe for his bride to be, who flees a few days before the wedding to set sail on the high seas in a search for an elusive giant squid. In the process, he comes across other monsters and strange happenings. Sounds fun, but when nothing has happened halfway through the book, I’m out.
3. Journal of a UFO Investigator by David Halperin
What should have been a nice story about a boy who feels like he doesn’t fit in, turns into a completely nonsensical ungrounded story of absolutely nothing.
If you enjoyed Twilight, but look for something a bit more realistic (which is a stretch), perhaps Thirteen Reasons Why is for you. One can’t help but wonder, is this really what is out there right now in teen fiction? No doubt, countless clueless teenagers will read this and think it saved their life. “How relatable,” fifteen year old girls and boys will say. But frankly, if you enjoyed this novel, you should give yourself a nice punch in the face.
1. These Children Who Come At You With Knives by Jim Knipfel
I had read about this collection of short stories for over a year and heard nothing but good things. Classic example of over-rated garbage. I found the entire book to be very poorly written and juvenile. It should make you wonder why there are still struggling authors out there, but this guy has a book. Shame.